superglue

whoever invented superglue was a pure genius. it is seriously the best, they even use it in hospitals to "glue" people back together. my grandpa even used it once to seal up his hand after cutting it open when he fell off a tree (long story). 

which gets me to my point, today at work i totally sliced my finger (i thought it would just be like a paper cut, but turns out it is much deeper than a regular paper cut) and it just keeps reopening. so i thought, well, if i had some superglue, i could fix this right up! but i don't, and to be totally honest, that kind of scares me, like what if it burns or doesn't go away...

anyways, it then got me thinking about some friendships I've had in the past. as it seems, i have a hard time when it comes to friends. as outgoing and friendly as i try to be, i have a hard time finding friends who stick around. 

in junior high, i had a really close friendship with a group of girls, one in particular. but we all went our separate ways for high school. i figured that none of us had talked in a while, since no one had said anything to me, but i was wrong. they had all been doing things together still while i was left on the back burner. story of my life, right? i remember one night they actually invited me to hangout with them, well the sister did cause she was doing a small surprise party for her sister. but anyway. it started off fine, but the night slowly started getting worse and worse. overtime they would start talking about something and i would try to say something back, they would just brush it off or not let me talk at all. it got to the point where i just sat there feeling completely left out, which at that point i just asked the sister to drive me home. where i completely lost it. i will admit it, freshman year completely sucks for me, as did most of sophomore year. most weekend nights i spent babysitting. (which is why i learned to love shopping so much, cause i had all this money to blow!)

about two years ago, for some reason, we began hanging out again. we were in every way, or so i thought, best friends. then again, it happened. she stopped talking to me, stopped telling me about her life... thats when i realized that no matter how much superglue you put into a friendship, it won't last forever. 

it wares off, but at least it lets you know who your real friends are, which ones will want to stick around and want to be there. 

I'm that girl who is friends with everyone, yet has no real close friends. yea, it sucks, big time. especially when you want to just talk to someone about your day while eating ice-cream and watching movies. or if you want someone to hangout with in general... 

but I've learned to come to grips with it, and found that some of the closest friends i have were my co-workers from Nordstrom. (which stinks cause i know live in utah, where you would think that i would have found plenty of friends by now! thats not to say i haven't got any friends, cause i do, just not real close ones).  

also family, i know everyone says this, but it is so so true. they are always there for you. so don't ever take that for granted. 

enough of my sappy ranting, although, since i know NO ONE reads this, i could go on and on. although i dont want to feel bad about myself, cause i have so many reasons to be happy! 

so here is to being happy with who you are and where you are in life. enjoy it while you can cause change is a constant thing. 

ally

ummm, don't you love how short of an attention span i have. my brain literally jumps around from one thing to another so fast, i can't keep up half of the time.